Lucky me. [ dry-like. peggy rakes fingers through her curls. ] What a bloody awful conversation you must have had with him, however. [ ... ] Did he blush?
[ let's not be too coy. peggy rather likes it when he blushes. ]
[ an amused snort. her would-be-beau, turned into a noun? not a bad curve of events. ]
I'm a good thing, am I? [ dry, still, but not without a verbal doffing of the cap. ] I suppose I should count myself fortunate for the approval of his friends.
Shall I be honest for a turn? [ a snort of nearly-laughter. ] It never really had the opportunity to 'work' before, either. Steve never even asked me for a date until he was already crashing -- at the time, it all felt very tragic.
Lately, it's more like annoying. [ with him in the fleet, it strips the moment of its rawer pain and she's left wondering how one man who's so brave could equally be so cowardly. ]
Leave it to him to finally find the guts when there's no chance he'll have to follow through. [She shakes her head a little. She can imagine the frustration, and also how strange it would be to have that tragedy taken away.]
Should I ask if you'd rather move on yourself?
[Because maybe she already had. Natasha suspected she knew the answer already, but it deserved a nod.]
I didn't. Not for a very long time. [ she sounds tired. the harder question, however, would have been who she'd been keen to move along with. but daniel has his bride-to-be, now.
and jason... ]
But time marched on. I accepted the inevitable. Nothing much serious has come of it -- just as well, because a great deal of that 'moving on' found itself undone. Here.
[ there's no reason to hide it, really. merely seeing a man she'd taken for dead had brought a part of her back to life. ]
There is that. [Natasha has to admit, that one is a mood killer.] I've heard you can man some extra money that way, but can't say I'm convinced it's worth it.
[ peggy isn't shy. it isn't as though she hasn't worked her better angles for the mission in the past. it isn't as though she wouldn't refrain from considering the pay-off in a different situation. but this is steve; it's as near as she's come to true honest-to-goodness love. it's the last thing she wants to cheapen with an audience. ]
It feels like it isn't. [ worth it. ] Until the moment he's gone, again, and I'll start kicking myself once more.
And I figured it would take more than simply being myself to impress you. [ wry, still. ] I'm afraid it can't be helped. Hampstead, born and raised.
[ of course, she can shake the british off when she needs to. one day she might slip into russian for natasha's benefit; she already does so with bucky. ]
Nothing wrong with that. I appreciate your tact. [Which begs the actual question, but Natasha will let it go. She's probably stuck her nose more than far enough into she and Steve's business far enough for one day.]
So tell me about this firing range plan. What did you two have in mind? How did you even end up working on it together?
[ -- it's just as well, as peggy isn't inclined to explain much further. likely, enough can be inferred from between the lines.
instead: ] Truthfully? It was Jim who tied me and -- [ a tilt of her head ] you together on it. Jim...the Barnes from an alternate timeline where he became Captain America in Steve's stead.
[ oh, boy, was that man soft as lights on natasha. ]
She wasn't. But -- she was in the Fleet before I was, and so spent a great deal of time adjusting to the peculiarities of his timeline. Long before any familiar version of Steve himself arrived.
[ peggy possesses the benefit of having met james barnes before the fall -- when he was part of the howling commandos, at that. the transition from commando to captain america had been understandable. expected. and that man -- jim, although hollowed out in his own way, had a spark of the barnes she'd once known in the war. it's harder to see that spark in the winter soldier. harder, still, these days.
peggy offers a stiff shake of her head. ] Now, that was a delicate situation. Steve as the Winter Soldier. He called himself Orion. I won't deny I was unnerved.
Orion, huh. [Natasha does have some trouble picturing that somehow. The details that get to you, huh?] Unnerved seems like a healthy, rational reaction.
[Natasha almost leaves it there. These aren't her people, and she very likely won't ever meet them, or if she does yet another different version of them. But curiosity wins out.]
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[A good one who's not above ratting out a friend for the right cause, apparently.]
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[ let's not be too coy. peggy rather likes it when he blushes. ]
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It was endearing.
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He's worse than a school-girl, sometimes.
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[Natasha is comfortably amused by that.]
You see why I felt like I had to get involved. Normally I'd let my friends handle heir own love lives, but when that friend is Steve...
He'll just Steve himself right out of a good thing.
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I'm a good thing, am I? [ dry, still, but not without a verbal doffing of the cap. ] I suppose I should count myself fortunate for the approval of his friends.
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[Natasha shrugs, philosophical about the fact that nothing lasts forever.]
What does in the end? It worked for a while.
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Lately, it's more like annoying. [ with him in the fleet, it strips the moment of its rawer pain and she's left wondering how one man who's so brave could equally be so cowardly. ]
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Should I ask if you'd rather move on yourself?
[Because maybe she already had. Natasha suspected she knew the answer already, but it deserved a nod.]
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and jason... ]
But time marched on. I accepted the inevitable. Nothing much serious has come of it -- just as well, because a great deal of that 'moving on' found itself undone. Here.
[ there's no reason to hide it, really. merely seeing a man she'd taken for dead had brought a part of her back to life. ]
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The supposed cameras don't do much for making it simple.
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It feels like it isn't. [ worth it. ] Until the moment he's gone, again, and I'll start kicking myself once more.
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I doubt you'll have to worry about too much exposure too soon, but that'd be something to talk to Steve about.
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[ of course, she can shake the british off when she needs to. one day she might slip into russian for natasha's benefit; she already does so with bucky. ]
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So tell me about this firing range plan. What did you two have in mind? How did you even end up working on it together?
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instead: ] Truthfully? It was Jim who tied me and -- [ a tilt of her head ] you together on it. Jim...the Barnes from an alternate timeline where he became Captain America in Steve's stead.
[ oh, boy, was that man soft as lights on natasha. ]
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[Natasha's brows draw together a little at that, forming a slight frown.]
She wasn't from his timeline, was she?
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[She shakes her head a little.]
I have a hard time picturing it. Somehow it's easier to for me to imagine the other way around—Steve as he Winter Soldier.
[Easier to picture someone whole broken than someone you've only known damaged how he might have been if things had been different, she means.
Both options make her a little uneasy, but one is somehow stranger than the other.]
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peggy offers a stiff shake of her head. ] Now, that was a delicate situation. Steve as the Winter Soldier. He called himself Orion. I won't deny I was unnerved.
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[Natasha almost leaves it there. These aren't her people, and she very likely won't ever meet them, or if she does yet another different version of them. But curiosity wins out.]
Do you know if he eventually got out?
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