I don't know who else it would be. [ she teases, because as smooth as this exit might have been -- it's an endearingly clumsy re-entrance. peggy doesn't leap for her tea. she's a little too tired and a little too sore. she'll let it cool, first. ] My usual guard-dog at moments like these has made himself rather AWOL.
[ a note of concern: ] Has Max come back yet?
[ last she'd known, he'd disappeared on one of the shuttles. gone. ]
[ not only in age but in spirit, in the way he sometimes wishes they could be, he and her, before the war and everything else had matured them to what they are. sometimes he thinks he would have liked to see her, the girl she was before, with her concerns weren't as plenty. ]
He'll come back. Has to make sure I'm behaving myself.
[ her dismay at his continued disappearance is evident -- one might argue, in effect, that he might be the dearest friend she's made since arriving in this fleet. apart from friends from home, at least.
but that same dismay is knocked quickly off her face. she frowns for a whole other reason. ] Behaving yourself? [ her thoughts flee elsewhere. ] You didn't touch his shuttle, did you?
I truly believe he's a bit protective of everyone. [ ... ] Once you scratch the surface rust and dirt away, he's rather soft-hearted. Not that he believes it of himself.
[ it's a mutual soft spot, won through a long protracted acquaintanceship filled with muted mumbles and passive aggressive kindness. the odd mended cut and a great many companionable silences. he's like an old stray she feels compelled to continue helping, as though she might somehow find absolution through good works. ]
If he doesn't come back on his own, the Atroma will do it for us. He tried to run before; I thought he might have overcame the urge. I suppose his stint as a happier version of himself undid all that hard work.
[ he never told her that, perhaps he shouldn't be telling her now, either. She's hurt and too many things linger in her mind already. ]
When I woke up, they had me in a room - they made it look like something straight outta the 40s but it wasn't too convincing. I walked out and it was a whole new world. It was seconds for me and seventy years for them. It was a few good weeks before I went out again.
[ and only because he had to and mostly because of her connection to the story. ]
[ she shakes her head. for the life of her, she cannot imagine steve rogers running away. perhaps it happened and perhaps it didn't -- but for peggy, it felt unlikely. or else as though he retold the circumstances with too much modesty in mind. and yet she had to wonder how she herself might cope with such strangeness. waking up to a lie, and diving head-first into...what? a century that likely no longer held any place for her.
she watches him with sympathy. ] And yet you didn't run for long, did you?
Maybe. Hopefully. [ ... ] He's not like you or I. He doesn't brook much in the way of heroics -- although he can be uncommonly selfless in his own right, I think that only makes him feel more and more vulnerable.
[ hm. ] And his younger self spoke at such length about his family.
[ a sound from the back of her throat. ratings. god help them all should their fates truly be so precious -- resting on the frenetic activity of a television programme. ]
Didn't know he had one. A wife. A child. [ ... ] Who knows what must have befallen them. I don't dare ask, now, if he does return.
Maybe he'll tell you in his own time. I'm sure he'll appreciate you not asking. I hope the others would have enough sense to do the same.
[ he huffs out his indignation of all of this. grief turning into a spectacle of a sort, Winter being turned into a weapon again, peggy's injuries ]
They could be anywhere and we can't even navigate these ships long enough to go anywhere except the places they want us to. Still - nothing is without its flaws. They have to have something that's off.
You're still looking for a chink in their armour. Good. [ she eases off the darker topic, for the time being. best to let it stew until she needs must confront max again, and then she might as well pretend like it never happened.
it seems to be the way of it with the wastelander. ]
I keep hard-copy notes. I don't like the grip they have on the electronic systems.
[ she doesn't like electronic systems to begin with, jeez. ]
A bit too well. I've spent most my life having more sick days than good days.
[ it's been a source of frustration, as much as has always tried not to let it become that. A sad story, really, a lot of determination and willingness and the right spirit but not the best physical condition by far ]
I wasn't very good at it, either.
[ either, which is how he knows one when he sees one ]
But I had insistent company.
[ namely Bucky who always tried. He didn't always succeed but he sure did try. ]
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[ a note of concern: ] Has Max come back yet?
[ last she'd known, he'd disappeared on one of the shuttles. gone. ]
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[ not only in age but in spirit, in the way he sometimes wishes they could be, he and her, before the war and everything else had matured them to what they are. sometimes he thinks he would have liked to see her, the girl she was before, with her concerns weren't as plenty. ]
He'll come back. Has to make sure I'm behaving myself.
[ LOOK THEY HAD A TALK ]
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but that same dismay is knocked quickly off her face. she frowns for a whole other reason. ] Behaving yourself? [ her thoughts flee elsewhere. ] You didn't touch his shuttle, did you?
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[ his lips twitch into something of an embarrassed smile. ]
I think he's very protective of you. I don't know that I've earned his approval yet.
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[ his smile turns fond ]
I could hover around the shuttle, might draw him back.
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If he doesn't come back on his own, the Atroma will do it for us. He tried to run before; I thought he might have overcame the urge. I suppose his stint as a happier version of himself undid all that hard work.
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[ until Fury brought him out to the world and into the Avengers, he was dealing rather poorly with his memories too, after all. ]
Especially like that.
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[ he never told her that, perhaps he shouldn't be telling her now, either. She's hurt and too many things linger in her mind already. ]
When I woke up, they had me in a room - they made it look like something straight outta the 40s but it wasn't too convincing. I walked out and it was a whole new world. It was seconds for me and seventy years for them. It was a few good weeks before I went out again.
[ and only because he had to and mostly because of her connection to the story. ]
Maybe that was also running away.
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she watches him with sympathy. ] And yet you didn't run for long, did you?
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[ it was a different war and a different enemy but the calling remained the same. ]
He'll come back too.
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[ hm. ] And his younger self spoke at such length about his family.
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[ a sigh as he shakes his head ]
You know, ratings must have dropped pretty bad for them to have to do all of this. Max, Winter.
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Didn't know he had one. A wife. A child. [ ... ] Who knows what must have befallen them. I don't dare ask, now, if he does return.
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[ he huffs out his indignation of all of this. grief turning into a spectacle of a sort, Winter being turned into a weapon again, peggy's injuries ]
They could be anywhere and we can't even navigate these ships long enough to go anywhere except the places they want us to. Still - nothing is without its flaws. They have to have something that's off.
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it seems to be the way of it with the wastelander. ]
I keep hard-copy notes. I don't like the grip they have on the electronic systems.
[ she doesn't like electronic systems to begin with, jeez. ]
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[ perhaps their chances aren't big but he'll work with that he's got. ]
I know what you mean.
[ in his logic, it's called the written word for a reason ]
I'll take a look at those once all of this blows ever.
[ when Winter comes back, that is, and when she's healed. All else will have to wait until then. ]
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I'm pretty happy where I am.
[ by her side, even when she's hurt, especially when she's hurt ]
You're not very good at resting.
[ just putting it out there, Peg. ]
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[ it's been a source of frustration, as much as has always tried not to let it become that. A sad story, really, a lot of determination and willingness and the right spirit but not the best physical condition by far ]
I wasn't very good at it, either.
[ either, which is how he knows one when he sees one ]
But I had insistent company.
[ namely Bucky who always tried. He didn't always succeed but he sure did try. ]
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[ a nod ]
He asked me about you.
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